Free Dictionary defines denial as : “a process by which painful thoughts are not permitted into the consciousness.” Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the exact description of the times we’re living in and through right now: Banks deny they have problems, the President is the master of denial, TV networks deny the fact that their viewership is aging rapidly, advertising agencies continue to do business as usual while their business is dying around them. And the list goes on and on: Just look at industries changing (in some instances disappearing in front of our eyes) - Automotive, Yahoo!, Retailers, Record Labels.

Businesses are organisms. I always compare them to human beings. They have their own consciousness, their own soul, their own spirit. - And most companies act like smokers: They know they’re indulging in bad habits, a habit that will kill them one day. Every day they learn new facts how the smoke contains millions of carcinogens, how your chances of cancer/heart disease increase every time you light up. Standing outside in the rain, they suck on their cigarettes either proclaiming to quit soon or somehow rationalizing that they enjoy their habit.

Denial can come in various forms: Minimizing (It’s not going to be that bad), Cockiness (I’ve handled more difficult situations before), Rationalizing (Our revenue is down by 5%, we don’t have a real problem), Blaming (The clients don’t get it) and Intellectualizing (The new study shows everything will be good.) Or you can just lie to yourself, manipulate others, be defiant or withdraw. In the end, all denial ends in distaster.

Fact is, the advent of personal technology has changed media consumption behavior. Fact is, we’re undergoing dramatic demographic changes. And, fact is, humans are changing the way they interact with each other and institutions in new, never before seen ways.

These facts should lead businesses to rethink their business/marketing/service/brand strategies. Better today since delay is the deadliest form of denial. Just ask how IndyMac, Chrysler and Yahoo feel about their denials now.

Russell Davies compares the big agencies to the coal-mining business. Growing up close to coal mines, I think his analogy is brilliant:

“Mining died in the UK because it was uneconomic, not because all the coal suddenly disappeared. In many parts of the world it’s still a thriving business, it’s still economic. That seems quite like the ad agency business.

Extracting attention using advertising agencies isn’t suddenly impossible, it’s just gradually becoming uneconomic in the West. This is predictable and it’s possible to prepare for it - through retraining and re-skilling. Whether that will actually happen is debatable. There may be for a future for some specialist businesses and for a few heritage ones, but that’s about it.”

I was a kid when the coal mines started to close down in Germany. I never understood why miners demonstrated for months without any pay to keep their horrible job: Generations worked in the mines and died pre-maturely. I understood the idea of tradition but I also believed in the power of progress. The German government had to subsidize the mines for years (up to $200k per employee) to stay competitive and keep the miners union quiet.

The same is about to happen to disruptive advertising models. Yes, they still work but the costs are astronomical  Disruption models will start become inefficient and brands will move on to models to guarantee higher ROI’s. Corporations might be slow moving but they react quickly when the ROI is not working anymore. Agencies, just like the coal miners, will hold on to old business models as long as they possibly can. And that might be too late for most of them.

The breakup that comes out of nowhere. The cancellation of cabel service. The surprising resignation: The obvious signs were there, even outsiders could see the problems from far away. But people closest to the situation had no idea. They were surprised. Shocked.

Why do people and businesses have such a big problem hearing tough messages, aka the truth?

In surveys, conducted by Personnel Decisions International, managers seem to have skewed perceptions about their openness to challenging news. The results showed that managers often signal to their employees that they don’t want to hear bad news. In addition, many employees censor themselves. This broken communication model is hazardous to both parties: Bad news are not being communicated and positive ideas might be considered criticism. And not expressed.

Same is true for businesses.

Many businesses claim to listen but, ultimately, they just want to reinforce their own opinion. It’s not enough to just listen, you need to listen with an open mind. How?

First, admit that your business is a bad listener. You might have the best intentions but some of your actions (wittingly or not) just indicate to everyone that you don’t really listen.

Second, admit that it’s hard for you to take criticism. Believe me, it’s hard for everyone but criticism is the lifeline to your future success.

Third, it might be better if somebody else does the listening for you. Hire somebody you find trustworthy to listen to the conversation that’s happening out there. Somebody that doesn’t have a stake in your business. Somebody that didn’t pour his heart and soul into nurturing your business. Criticism doesn’t mean anything to them: They are not the ones being criticized. There are numerous companies out there listening to conversations all day long. (This fine one is one of them.)

And then it’s time for you to listen: Sit back and just listen. Don’t respond. Don’t react. Just listen. It might be the best thing you could ever do for your business.

Advertising used to be so easy: You write a cool tagline, develop a cool commercial, make sure all communications surrounding the commercial is integrated and then hope for the best. You worked for a great agency when you were thinking about the client goals throughout the creation process. You worked for a mediocre agency when everybody just cared about the awards and recognition. And you worked for a real crapshop when everybody was just thinking about their paycheck.

Ob boy, things have really changed. Now, agencies have to deliver experiences that improve people’s lives and, at the same time, make sure to help their clients with the bottom line. Thinking about awards shouldn’t even make the Top 10 list anymore.

In the old days, we tried to build emotional connections through funny 30-second sketches and innovative imagery. Today, we build emotional connections by helping people solve their problems: The widget displaying real-time traffic on your desktop, easing your commute and saving nanoseconds because you don’t have to type the URL. The Pizza Builder that makes the ordering process less arduous and so much more enjoyable. The Facebook CarPool application that helps people to connect with each other to reduce the their carbon footprint and get from A to B quicker.

The flashy ad doesn’t work anymore. People have moved on a while ago. Today, businesses build emotional connections  through utility. Make my life easier, more enjoyable, more experiential. Give me stories and memories to share, develop something special for me. Show that you understand me. Show that you don’t want to pollute my life with more noise. Show that you care about me. That’s how you develop connections and relationships.
And make people care about you.

The American culture is in love with nonconformity: Cowboys, Daniel Plainview (Daniel Day-Lewis) from ‘There will be blood’, Jesse Ventura, Ron Paul, Eliot Spitzer - the list is endless. The Milgram experiment illustrated the distrust towards authority:

“The extreme willingness of adults to go to almost any lengths on the command of an authority constitutes the chief finding of the study and the fact most urgently demanding explanation.

Ordinary people, simply doing their jobs, and without any particular hostility on their part, can become agents in a terrible destructive process. Moreover, even when the destructive effects of their work become patently clear, and they are asked to carry out actions incompatible with fundamental standards of morality, relatively few people have the resources needed to resist authority.”

The eroding trust in authorities (Enron, Catholic church, Presidency, etc.) fed the hunger for long wolves. People that do what they need to do because they feel like it. Moral superiority belongs to the loners that create their own rules.

Not so, says David Berreby, author of “Us and Them: Understanding your Tribal Mind”.

In a NY Times piece, he explains that the psychologists Hodges and Geyser took a second look at the Milgram and Asch experiments and came to new conclusions:

“This means that the subjects in the most famous “people are sheep” experiments were not sheep at all - they were human beings who largely stuck to their guns, but now and then went along with the group. Why? Because in getting along with other people, most decent people know, as Hodges and Geyser put it, the “importance of cooperations, tact and social solidarity in situations that are tense or difficult.”

(…) Milgram’s “subjects were not simply obeying a leader, but responding to someone whose credentials and good faith they thought they could trust.” Without that kind of trust society would fall apart tomorrow, because most of what we know about the world comes to us from other people.”

David’s writing reminded me of Mark Earls’ “Herd” book, blog and overall thesis that it is our innate nature as “herd” animals that causes mass movements, not the influence of a handful of individuals.

The traditional church of marketing was built around the belief that humans are lone wolves that want to stand out from the crowd. The problem is that people have a tribal desire to follow the herd and be part of a group. Sure, there are instances when they want to stand out and be considered as lone wolves. But, the rest of the time, the same people want to be part of a group and just fit in.

To leverage the full power of Conversational Marketing, businesses have to change how they think about human/tribal behavior. The advent of Social Networks and Web 2.0 has shown us that humans want to stand out by fitting in. Social Media campaigns have to feed this primal human desire and help people to belong.

Everybody is talking about listening: Listen to your customers, listen to employees, listen to your intuition. Listening has become the new buzzword in the marketing world. The whole idea of Conversational Marketing/Social Media is based on the concept of listening. And listening can make or break your business. But if you don’t know how to listen, you might do more harm to your business than you ever imagined.

Remember the Simpsons Episode, ‘Oh Brother, Where Art Thou’? Homer meets his half-brother, Herb Powell, head honcho of the Powell Motors car company, who decides that Homer is the perfect match to design a car for the average American. Homer comes up with a concept that he markets as ‘powerful like a gorilla, yet soft and yielding like a Nerf ball’, featuring three horns that play ‘La Cucaracha’ and a sound-proof bubble dome for his kids. Powell Motors goes out of business shortly after.

Yes, Herb Powell, listened. But he didn’t listen actively.

No matter in what business you’re in, customers expect from brands to solve their problems. Allergy medicine solves the annoying hay fever problem. Cottonelle for Kids solves a potty training problem. Mac’s solve the virus problem. (At least, reducing it.) Cottonelle for Kids solved a common parenting problem because they asked the right questions. Asking people ‘What do you want?’ will get you nowhere. Asking people ‘Tell me about yourself and the common issues you’re facing on a daily basis.’ will get your creative juices going.

Suggestions by people should not be treated as requirements for the next phase of your product development. Instead, suggestions need to be regarded as problem reflections that you’re tasked to resolve. Does a parent really want a soundproof bubble for their kids while driving long distances? Or do they want ways to entertain their kids safely while they can focus on the drive and listen to radio at the same time?

Businesses need to structure their listening initiatives to ensure they suspend their own frame of reference and judgement while leaning forward and attentively engaging in a conversation. The advent of UGC, Social Networks and consumer participation clearly show that people are growing out of the passive consumption phase. Brands need to catch up quickly. Or they end up with below monstrosity.

Good leaders and sales people have known this forever: A sense of connection makes a huge difference. Connections make or break your job interview. Connections help organizations in their collaboration and innovation efforts. Connections help people to feel better about themselves and make it through hard times.

Management 101 focuses on the employee-employer relationship alone. Recognition and respect are the keywords for a mutually rewarding relationship. While businesses continue to build relationships with people, they end up being too focused on transactions and re-purchase rate.

Instead, businesses need to focus on valuable and open relationships with people.
Valuable not in the sense of ROI (It’s a by-product, not the ultimate goal), rather as an understanding of the universal nature of people and the appreciation of individual contribution. Just taking the time and effort to connect with people is a valuable asset for businesses.  Kindness, fairness and social intelligence go a long way to achieve valuable connections.

These valuable connections will thrive in an open environment. An honest and safe place where people can share their opinion in order to gain understanding and develop new ideas. Nothing feels better to humans than being respected and recognized.

Using Jim Collins’ terminology:  Good companies value their employees and encourage open dialogue. Great companies extend this valuation and openness to everybody. You need the employee-business foundation before you can extend this model to your marketing.

Remember: Conversational Marketing is not a tactic. It’s a mindset that will change your business in magical ways.

Looks like a heart, doesn’t it? KevinRoberts would love it.

It’s fascinating to see how the media and public trash Silda Spitzer for her appearance during the apology press conference last Monday. People describe her behavior as nauseating, phony, awful. Years ago when Hillary Clinton stood by Bill or Dina Matos McGreevey flanked her husband through his coming-out affair, the public almost admired the courage and love of these women. Today, the same women would face the wrath of the majority.

Sure, one reason is the lack of authenticity. Is there a wife in this world holding hands with her husband a few days after she found out about $4,000 hookers? We’ve seen it too many times (Hillary, Matos McGreevy and Suzanne Craig come to mind) and we just don’t believe our eyes anymore. Just like the defendant claiming not guilty after being caught on tape. Or the kid being caught in the cookie jar. Over years of life and media experience, people have formed very sensitive antennas for bull***t.

Having said that, we encounter bull***t all day long but don’t get that enraged. Why are that many people angry?

Silda Spitzer played the part she was supposed to play in the past: Women were supposed to stand by their men. Women were supposed to look adoringly at their husbands when they deliver the stump speech for the gazillionth time. Times have changed.

All of us encounter new and changing expectations each and every day.As a father, it’s not enough to just pat your kid on the back and go to work. Now, you need to change diapers and overcome endless sleepless to be called a father. Same is true for agencies: Three Martini lunches and an overnight creative effort won’t win you any pitch anymore. There’s a lot of chatter about the changing agency landscape.

Big Agencies used to be celebrity-filled creative hot shops with no strategic insights and, besides awards, no reason to exist, besides looking beautiful. While many creative agencies have adjusted to the times and revealed innovative creative work, most media agencies have not learned their lesson. They are still smiling at their beloved creative shop and client.

Yes, I know. Changing from stepchild at the table to household leader is hard. But media agencies have no choice: People are not where they used to be and media is not as easy as it used to be. Reaching the audience has become a monumental task. Engaging the audience feels like a Sisyphean task. Dont’ even bother asking about connecting.

Agencies have to adjust to them times. Reach loses its importance. Real, authentic connections become essential. This might happen through product development participation, advanced design or conversational marketing. But it has to happen. And will.

Otherwise, you’ll end up in a pitiful spot. Just like Silda Spitzer.

I’ve been thinking a lot about brands lately and how they need to change in the new marketing reality in order to survive. Many things have changed: what defines a brand, who defines a brand, the roles communities play in defining and establishing a brand. Brands are still very important, maybe more important than ever, but brands needs to shift their focus from attention to loyalty.

The old marketing world told us that getting the attention of people, engaging them in your brand world, will ultimately lead to consideration and purchase. Since it’s becoming increasingly harder to break through the clutter, most agencies focused their efforts on getting attention at any cost: Takeovers, Pre-Rolls, Interstitials, etc. And, as we all know, they are losing the battle: abysmal CTR’s and undesirable ROI’s coupled with apathy towards advertising. Focusing on mass attention barely works and will not work in the long run.

The future of marketing is getting attention through brand loyalty. I’m not talking about CRM or other top-down connection programs imposed by brands. In some cases they might achieve the business goal of repurchasing, more often than not based on lack of alternatives or convenience.

Traditional brand loyalty exists when people have a high attitude the brand. In the new marketing reality, this high attitude has to be developed through building relationships with people. Not marketing to people, rather practically and emotionally connect businesses with people. In many ways, a practical, efficient connection with a business often leads to an emotional connection. (My Infiniti Service Manager has done more to build my relationship with the luxury brand than any glossy brochure, commercial or banner ad.) These connections are not restrained by information transmitters or reach mechanisms. Frankly, the only limit imposed on these connections is based on organizational issues within businesses.

Seth Godin says it best in his new book ‘Meatball Sundae’:

“Feel free to get all excited about the neat things you can do with the New Marketing. But be prepared to fail. If you don’t get your marketing in sync with your organization and your product, game over.”

People are starting to define brand loyalty by the degree businesses enrich their lives. This encompasses all brand touchpoints: Service, Retail, Emails, Customer Support, etc. People expect a string of connectivness from all touchpoints. It can be practical, efficient or, at best, emotional. These connections turn into relationships and, ultimately, brand loyalty.

Brands will matter more than ever. And a brand can’t be developed in a vacuum or through brand exercises. Good brands always were organic expressions of organizational structures, vision and passion. Future great brands will be developed and nurtured through relationships.Because everybody has a seat on the brand table today. Make them feel at home.

Dear Mr. Oscar,

happy birthday. You’ve lived a long life and shared with us many beautiful moments. But it’s time to get the Ginseng root out and stop acting your age:

Watching the Academy Awards has become a borefest. We’re all waiting for moments (Jack Palance one-armed push-ups, streakers, whatever) but instead we get songs and dances and ‘I want to thank the Academy’ speeches.

Mr. Oscar, you’re suffering from a problem shared by many businesses: You don’t listen.

How many of us complained about the length of the show? 4 hours is even too long for a Super Bowl. 8 hours if you count the pre- and post-event coverage. Do we really need to see all the songs? Wouldn’t a medley do it? How about all the smaller awards? Animated Short, for example. Is there a way to give the nominees a decent platform without boring us to death? Acceptance speeches - Does everybody have to thank the Academy and forget the rest of their speech?

Don’t get me wrong, Mr. Oscar, all award shows are facing a tough future: It used to be good enough to have the likes of Amy Winehouse and Brittney Spears on the bill to glue the nation to the TV. YouTube changed the consumption habits: Why wait for Amy Winehouse until 11pm if I can watch it next day rested in the office? The YouTubification makes 4 hours of Academy Awards almost unbearable. While we sit through another ‘Enchanted’ song we feel life slipping way: I could have read the Sunday NY Times, a book, my toaster manual - anything would be better.

What to do? First and foremost - Listen.

Listen to the desires of people why they watch the show. Understand that most people don’t care about 90% of the show. They are looking for the big awards, the big stars colliding, the big moments.

It’s going to be tough, Mr. Oscar. 80 years it’s been all about you. You were the center of the universe, everything revolved around you. Not anymore. People are snacking entertainment, easily distracted, bored. You have to make the show about the people outside of the Kodak Theatre. In this new marketing reality, the less selfish brands become, the more successful they will be.

Mr. Oscar, you had a good run. And I hope the run continues. But you need to change. It’s tough when you’re 80, I know. But you have no choice. Remember silent movies? Just saying.

Good luck!